Wednesday, August 03, 2016

some high/lowlights, and scarcity vs abundance

Things currently making me happy

Heavy Balloon by Tele Novella:  Soundcloud Link

Zella high-waisted crop leggings


super comfortable & on sale!


Weekends off with Josh.  Seriously, nothing has made me happier than our schedule shift to working the same weekends this year.  Definitely repeating in 2017.

Running in 79F with 93% humidity at 6am.  This actually felt somewhat cool to me.  I guess I am acclimated.

Hearing Cameron say "I go to LEGOLAND!" every 5 minutes with such joy and zest (we have a trip there coming up) despite the fact that there is no way he could know what that even means.

Olympics are coming.  I wonder if the kids will have enough attention span to watch some of the sports with me.

The kids consistently sleeping past 7 am.  They are definitely going to bed later (8:00 - 8:30 pm for Cameron, 9:00 pm last night for A who apparently "rested" at camp)


Things not making me happy

Politics

Mosquitos (and Zika) basically in my neighborhood.  My heart goes out to anyone TTC right now in FL.  The risks are probably low right now (though rising) but the stakes are so high; I am sure I would be really really anxious about it.


hmm.  maybe?


The Hottest Summer On Record (this fills me with despair and fear for the future, honestly.)

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I have been doing some thinking about my goals, and fitting so much into a limited life/time frame.  Despite the fact that resources truly are limited (no one has as many hours as they would like!), I am really trying to cultivate an abundance mindset -- as opposed to scarcity -- in several realms.   Honesty, this is not my natural instinct.  I always feel like I am running out of time, like I am behind schedule, like I am in desperate need of getting to the next thing.  Some of this I think stems from really hating sleep deprivation.  Some of it may be just my personality.

I have known a few individuals that have always treated me (and everyone else!) like they had all of the time in the world.  Conversations with these people never feel rushed.  They rarely come across as stressed and yet -- in my experience -- they are often shockingly (perhaps paradoxically?) productive and effective.

What abundance means to me:
(small and large examples)

- NOT hoarding things like notebooks - but actually using them :)

- Giving the kids extra time and attention when they need it.

- Being selective about food choices, because there will always be other delicious opportunities down the road (perhaps on an S day . . . )

- Giving patients extra time and attention when they need it.  (This does have boundaries of course.  I DO want to generally keep on schedule because I think it is unfair to later patients to run significantly late.  But within each encounter, there is some wiggle room and sometimes I find myself afraid to use it.)

- Stocking up on things I know we will need (ummm diapers.  wipes.  will be a thrilling day when these no longer fit into this category)!  I guess this is more tied to a financial sense of abundance.  But the two are definitely linked.

- Taking time to do little things for me, like meditation and skincare and reading.  It can be easy for me to frantically decide there just ISN'T ENOUGH time.  Yet when I just do them, somehow it all works out.

- Saying yes to interesting experiences or important opportunities.  And fun.

- Being generous with others: time in some cases, and tangible things in others.

I am definitely not always there yet with any of the above.  But I know that I feel so much better when I lean this way.