Monday, April 14, 2014

thoughts on the blog

almost 10 years in.
When I started to post in this space, blogging wasn't so much of a thing.  Most people weren't 'monetizing' their online musings.  Pinterest didn't exist, nor did Instagram (nor did ubiquitous high-quality camera-phones, for that matter!) and Facebook was a mere shadow of its current behemoth self.

Some of you have been reading forever and remember when I wrote mostly about my medical school experience.  Others began reading when I started posting more about running (especially over the course of my marathon years: 2005 - 2009).  Then TTC happened, and motherhood, and now I suppose I've joined the mommyblogging ranks, though that truly wasn't (and isn't) my intention.

I often do a lot of thinking -- and writing -- about time.  And every so often, I start to wonder whether the time I spend typing out my thoughts here is worth the precious minutes taken up.  In addition, as Annabel and Cameron grow older, things become even more complicated.  Will they feel exposed if I talk about parenting issues or post pictures of them -- even if I limit/censor the selection?

Earlier this weekend, I actually wrote out a list of pros/cons to potentially giving up this hobby of mine.

pros to quitting included:

* Having more time for other things.  (the most obvious and main reason for my initial musing)
* Less public exposure (both for A & C, and for my professional life -- although I never post anything here that I would not want my patients to read, and I'd actually love to create a series of useful posts for patients!)
* Sometimes I question my own authenticity.  As in:  do I shape the blog, or do I sometimes let it shape me?  A somewhat scary thought.  Plus, in this social media-obsessed generation, I don't want to view my own experiences through the lens of what might make a good post.  There's a blurry line between sharing happy moments and living-for-the-camera, and I want to avoid the latter at all costs.
* Maybe it would help me seek out more quality relationships (friends) OUTSIDE the online realm, something I currently feel I am in need of.

cons to quitting included:
* I enjoy writing here.  A lot.  It is really my only creative outlet right now
* Writing here is good practice, as I still think I may want to write a book someday (likely a patient-directed book related to my profession, but I haven't entirely decided yet!)
* Often writing does serve as a way for me to analyze things in an effective way.
* Posting can be a source of accountability
* I like having the camaraderie of other women (especially women) experiencing similar challenges with parenting, work-life balance, and the like
* I love the community of commenters and receiving at least some feedback on many of my posts

in the end, I am glad I took the time to consciously address this issue -- and I feel confident that I'd like to continue to write here.  While there are a few negatives and I see time pressure mounting even more when I head back to work, I think the positive sides of taking these moments to share some of the pieces of my life here are worth it.  In some ways, thinking about this has actually motivated me to write more, and on some different topics.  I do sort of miss thinking about this blog as a daily (or near-daily) habit.

And on that note:  anything anyone would like me to write about, or topics you'd like to see more/less of?  I won't promise anything, but I am always interested in your ideas.