Wednesday, March 07, 2018

back to work: Best of Both Worlds?

Well, I made it!

Monday was my first day back at work, and for the most part it went well.  I did have a very long commute home (70 minutes!) thanks to a jam on I-95 and was hyperventilating about getting home in time for G's last feeding, but it worked out.  Our nanny did an amazing job incorporating G into her routines, and she kept me in the loop about how well things were going, which definitely helped.

I finished 90% of my patient notes.  I saw about 80% of my typical patient load, which is pretty strong for a first day!   I wasn't terribly emotional about things, probably because I was too focused on trying to be maximally productive.

And as for the most stressful aspect? 

Office setup: mini-fridge + pump that lives there
I think I'm going to add a space heater + I will have optimized this to the extent possible!

Well - I pumped enough.  15 oz for the day (5 oz in the AM / 10 oz during the work day itself), while she drank 13.5 oz (3 x 4.5 oz bottles).  I know this is going to be a continual challenge, but I'm trying (trying) to just take it one day at a time and focus on effort NOT outcome.

(Although speaking of effort . . . I think I am going to stop pumping in the early AM on my days off.  Even though I consistently did this for the past 2 months, I think my supply never really adjusted and it was leading to a cycle every single day where she'd eat, and beginning with that first not-completely-full feeding of the day, not be completely satisfied, never go long enough between feedings, and culminate in desperate hourly feedings by late afternoon.  I'm glad I was able to do this and build my stash, but I want to enjoy my days off with her.  So for now, I'm just going to feed her on those days, and not the freezer!  A crazy idea, I know.)

I missed her, but it was okay.  And I thoroughly enjoyed yesterday's day off!

floor time!

Thankfully, I came away reminded that I really do enjoy and get a sense of fulfillment from my career, even on a day-to-day level.  And I love the balance of working outside the home, particularly now that I am 4 days/week.  I know things will be easier and make more sense once the nursing piece is out of the picture, but I think it's worth just pushing through the next several (+?) months or so.  

So, yeah.  I really do think I am experiencing the Best of Both Worlds, even if it is not going to be the easiest of both worlds for a while (or ever. . .).  Here goes the rest of the week!  I have some extra challenges today and tomorrow as I am at an off-site training (all residency-related stuff!) and will not have access to my Pumping Palace but hopefully there will be an empty office and a fridge I can use.  

(If not . . . I guess there's always my car.  Or a bathroom.)

Annabel's shoe take on work/life balance
(taken on Crazy Shoe Day at school . . . yes it's a thing) 

PS:  My SIL Rachel was our podcast guest this week!!  She's a teacher, mother, amazing aunt to A&C&G, community activist, and also happens to pretty much know everyone in the city of Miami Beach (only a slight exaggeration).  She's one of my favorite people and definitely someone who inspires me regularly.  Listen here or wherever you get your podcasts!

Hopefully back Friday with a Q1 goals review / Q2 goals post!