Tuesday, November 21, 2017

sense of impending something

This phase of pregnancy is so hard for me.

Not physically, though honestly I'm starting to lose my chipper sense of "I feel fine!" because: reflux, nausea, fatigue, etc (though for me it's still better than 1st trimester!).

It's the UNCERTAINTY!  Not knowing - will I go 40 weeks again?  Have to be induced at 41!?  Have my water break in the next 5 minutes followed by a precipitous delivery in the living room?  NO ONE CAN SAY.

For a person that really likes her plans - this is quite the challenge.

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I had an OB appointment yesterday, and that just got me riled up more, because I'm apparently 3 cm dilated already.  (Flashback to 2012 when apparently it took an entire night of painful labor to hit 2 cm.  1st vs 3rd baby, I guess!).  I really hadn't given much consideration to going much earlier than 40 weeks, but this dumb moment (and the OB's encouraged look) gave me pause.  He then asked if I wanted him to "stir things up" (? strip membranes?  not sure exactly what he meant) but I declined.  37 2/7 seems too early for that, plus I'm supposed to be on call this weekend!

(But I did think about it for a moment.)

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I am starting to get to the point where I can handle work*, the occasional workouts (I did run outside for 3 miles Sunday - one 3 minute walk break each mile), and . . . that's about it.  I decided I am not up for Lady Gaga (sad) or basically any evening activity, because I need to lie down by around 8:30 each night due to overall fatigue.  The kids have been . . . challenging, and maybe they sense that Change is coming, or perhaps it's just an energy mismatch between what I currently have and what they need.  We did have some nice times this past weekend but behavior (from A in particular) has been an issue.

(ALSO THE TIME CHANGE.  CAN WE JUST SWITCH BACK ALREADY?!)

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Thanks for your comments on Saturday's (impulsive!) post.  The author of the RS piece did respond nicely on her blog, and I wrote her back (here).  I get what she's saying about subjectivity in humor, and she definitely sounds like the meant well.  I stand by my position that it rubbed ME the wrong way (and it sounds like some others), no matter what was intended.  But I loved your feedback (both agreeing + disagreeing!) in the my comments as well.

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WEEKEND PIX

Book Fair



This is 37 weeks (and also 37 years old!)




Date night at a Heat game that we lost miserably 



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WORKOUTS
M - rest

T - treadmill, 32 min - 6 jog / 2 walk x 4

W - rest

R - ran outside, ran 20 min (~11:30/mi), walked 2.5 min, ran 7.5 min (11:20/mi)

F - rest

S - rest

S - ran outside, mi 1 @ 11:29, walked 3 min, mi 2 @ 11:53, walked 3 min, mi 3 @ 12:17, walked 4 min.  Definitely slowing down . . .

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PODCAST!
Episode #16 is up - and it's perhaps our juiciest yet  :)  Let me know what you think!



* though it has been insanely busy as patients are all trying to get in / have their labs done before I go out, which has resulted in quite the pile up.  Was doing notes from 5a-6a this morning which I admittedly really don't love.