Wednesday, June 20, 2012

there's only one first time

well, i survived
sorry to leave anyone hanging yesterday -- both annabel and i did in fact survive our first day of day care.  actually, i'm pretty sure she didn't mind one bit; however, i didn't fare quite as well.  i put on my game face initially, fastidiously gathering supplies and trying to act oh-so-cool-and-pragmatic about the whole thing.  i arrived carrying several bags filled with diapers/blankets/bottles/etc, plus a. in her infant seat and felt accomplished that i had managed to make it out the door without any major omissions.

but then when i got there and it was actually time to drop her off -- OMGGGG.  this part was much more difficult than anticipated!  it felt wrong on a primal level.  as in, i'm just supposed to leave my precious bundle in this room full of other babies and two adults i don't know and just LEAVE HER THERE?


noooooooo . . . . .

[obviously yes, that is pretty much what day care is.]

even though the rational side of me remains convinced it's the right choice for us, i felt guilty and sad and afraid as i slowly inched my way towards the door.  i fought back tears and lost the battle, but i think the very nice day care staff are used to these sorts of antics.  it did help that i saw 2 of my coworkers there just during drop-off -- i know that the center we're using is the best possible option, and everyone i've talked to has been happy with the care there.

ANYWAY.  i went home and was going to run, but i couldn't even bring myself to do that and ended up face-planted on the bed, unable to do anything but nap [and pump].  i did make it to my dentist appointment, which was sort of the whole point of taking her to day care on monday in the first place.  bonus: no cavities!

so: to make a long story short, it wasn't fun for me, but i survived.  and annabel did fine and drank 8 oz in just 3.5 hours.  i managed to maintain a zero-loss balance [pumped 8 oz that day between several sittings], but if she continues to go at that rate i'm in trouble.  ahh, one step at a time . . .

bonus?
as a reward for my suffering, a. slept 6.5 hours straight on monday night.  i did not bring her yesterday, and she never made it more than 3 in a row [harumph].  a side effect of the stimulation?  or just more milk than she's used to in the afternoon?  random occurrence?  time will tell . . .

-------------------------------------------------------

6.18 + 6.19


6.18 workout -- nada, other than aforementioned emotional struggles

6.18 dinner -- i can see the future of our culinary life, and it might look a little like this:


feta/spinach chicken sausage, grilled zucchini

although to be honest, this wasn't half bad. and josh didn't mind . . .


6.19 workout -- 4.35 mi in 40 minutes -- 0.5 mi warmup at 10:00/mi, 3.5 miles at 8:57/mi, then cool down until the clock read 40 minutes.

6.19 dinner -- salad + veg lasagna -- i made this for us and brought over a meal for sue, too!  it was pretty decent but next time i'd use more pesto!