as i mentioned previously, i’m ready to get back into some sort of running shape. even though my first love is longer distances, for time and breastfeeding reasons i’m going to start by focusing on speed [ <– well, relative speed] with the goal of working up to a midsummer 5K race. i’m sure i won’t PR, but it will at least be a starting point!
but before i dive headfirst into speedwork, i need to first be able to, you know, run for a half hour straight! i am planning on using the ‘fitness’ plans from daniels running formula to ramp back up. i’ll be doing some run/walk intervals [though more run than walk] to start out, which makes sense since that’s what i was doing for the last few months of pregnancy, anyway.
to begin [officially] in may. on thursday, i pumped and josh gave annabel her first bottle.
i have almost 9 weeks left of maternity leave! i know it’s going to go incredibly quickly, and i’d like to use it to full advantage. two things i’d love to do with my baby time [other than just hang out with her / snuggle / etc] include an infant massage class and mama/baby yoga. getting both of them on the calendar soon!
✔ finding my new mom look that doesn’t scream . . . well, ‘NEW MOM!’
part 1: finding a spare weekend morning to get my hair straightened. i can’t wait!!
part 2: wardrobe.
i’m hoping that within the coming weeks [months?] i’ll start to have more than one pair of jeans that fit to choose from. [not complaining — at least i have the one! and as i’m essentially at my pre-preg weight i am just sort of waiting for things to . . . redistribute. hoping that exercise — and time — will help].
however, i’m anticipating a bit of a situation when it comes to most of my tops. it’s still early yet, but in a few weeks i’m going to have to bite the bullet and do a little bit of interim shopping. obviously this isn’t TOP priority, but i still think it’s a good idea — in part for my own self-esteem.
“really? fun??”
from thursday’s comments:
things i am sure are SO much more challenging when caring for a baby AND an older child! plus, i think things are going to be much [much] harder for me when i go back to work and have SO much more to juggle.
right now, things really are that good. and fun. but i can absolutely imagine how they could change or be VERY different under other circumstances.
18 Comments
My fiancé and I are just starting to negotiate the terms of our future family–i.e. who gets to go for a bike rides once a baby is here:-) Are there some "issues" or topics that you’d recommend partners talking about before beginning to try for a family?
oh great topic!! i will definitely address in a later post – thank you for the idea!
you guys look very natural and happy with annabel can’t wait to see her in person
I would also say that it is a chill lifestyle for the moment, but most of the day I forget to go to the bathroom and rush between feedings to get anything done. I also have miserable days when I can’t wait to go back to work and also parts of the day where I can see how people enjoy staying home. But I honestly can say the newborn stage will probably not be my favorite! Does that make me a mean mom? Hope not.
In regards to the work of the newborn stage, I think that having gone through a challenging time like residency can shape your perspective. I’m not making assumptions about anyone else’s experience–I want to make that clear before I accidentally offend someone. But for me, nothing about taking care of a newborn could possibly have been harder than 30 hours in the PICU with 16 admissions. Nothing. Although there are many challenging days with my littles, it is the rare day that still doesn’t feel better than my worst days of residency. I also find taking care of my children to be more rewarding–not that being a pediatrician doesn’t have innumerable rewards, but the rewards of parenting are felt even more deeply for me. Hope you continue to experience the joy and less of the pain.
I had to comment on the newborn vs. young kid thing. Today we were with some friends who don’t have kids and we were all watching Miles run around like a crazy person (the kid has SO much energy that he has to shake his head from side to side while he is running to get even more energy out – he got it from his father). Albert was talking about the fact that we are going to have a new baby in a few months and he said "compared to a 2 year old, having a newborn is like having a pet rock!" I don’t totally agree (and I think he has some selective memory), but I really enjoyed many things about the newborn stage – getting to cuddle all the time, etc. It really is a special and very brief period of time (granted – I also had a good baby). I am happy to hear that you are enjoying your maternity leave because it really is a lot harder when you go back to work. Soak it up!
Original "fun" commenter here! I’m very glad to hear that things are indeed fun for you right now, I think that you’re a wonderful mom. But in terms of nothing could be harder than residency, I strongly disagree. I think a lot depends on the mom and the baby, as well as their circumstances. I’m a Army veteran, having served in Iraq from 2006 to 2007, and I finished my residency in internal medicine residency before having my second daughter.
Honestly? As a combat veteran and a physician, caring for my colicky, high energy first born (who also had severe reflux) was harder than ANYTHING I’ve ever had to do. I guess the moral of this story is that everyone is different, and maybe some people (like SHU) are more natural at being a mom than others (myself). But I love my daughters nonetheless, and I hope they are proud of their mom one day.
Jenny, first of all, thanks for your service. I’m the residency commenter above and didn’t mean to offend you. That’s why I tried to qualify and make sure that people understood that what was true for me wasn’t going to be true for everyone. Sorry if it didn’t come across well. I agree that the temperament and medical problems of a baby play a huge role in the experience. I don’t know that it makes you more or less of a natural mother. I think that anyone would find a colicky, refluxy, high-needs baby difficult. I have four children. While he does not sound as difficult as your infant, our fourth baby was much needier and more high-maintenance than any of my other children. I could not put him down for months and he would scream right in my face for significant parts of that time. There were moments when I thought I might lose my ever-loving mind, especially since those tended to be the moments when the other three littles needed something. I still enjoyed (and am still enjoying) his babyhood, probably because I knew he was likely our last baby and I forced myself to focus on the positive aspects of the time, but it wasn’t quite as *fun* as the infancies for my other children. I don’t know that I have a moral to this story, just to sympathize with what sounds like a very difficult time for you. And also to tell you that, from this internet stranger’s perspective, you aren’t a worse mom for having to survive it.
jenny i think you are right — that’s why my original reply for the most part focused on the fact that i realize i’m lucky just to have an easy baby [again — FOR NOW!!!!]. i think that makes ALL the difference. if she were up all night crying i know i would be feeling very differently than i do right now. and i agree with molly that ‘natural’ has nothing to do with it. i have no doubt that you are an amazing mom and thank you for your service. and wow — your experiences definitely confirm that even with a hugely broad perspective of what difficult is a high-needs newborn should not be discounted!
Mine is 8 weeks tomorrow ( it goes so fast!) and I also have been blessed with an easy baby who eats, sleeps, poops and smiles right on schedule. I went into work 5 days after I had her to drop off insurance paperwork and everyone was saying I looked super refreshed. Why wouldn’t I? I have nothing "to do" but hang w my angel! There have been days where my fiancée has been away on a fishing trip offshore, he is a comercial fisherman, for a few days and isabelle wants to cluster feed, I haven’t had one second to myself and she’s a little fussy… but it’s not bad at all. Im a special Ed teacher w students who have severe autism and developmental delays…. I’d take a newborn over them any day haha.
I think that comment and your response to ‘fun’ is great! The first thing that came to mind (being a second year med student gearing up for boards and knowing that you’re a fellow and have gone through LOTS of sleepless stretches) was that this is probably way more fun than a lot of the medicine journey…maybe that’s part of why you’ve got such a positive perspective on it 🙂
I’ve really enjoyed reading everyone’s comments and hearing how different our experiences have been. Thanks for being so candid! That’s why I like this blog so much 🙂 Jill, I definitely wasn’t insulted by your comment, but it did make me want to share more about my story.
I am truly happy for moms who have an easy newborn experience, and grateful that other moms who struggled like I did are strong enough to admit it. I do think that there’s a lot of societal pressure for moms to say like they love every minute of being a parent, and that it’s just not the same for dads. But that’s a discussion for another day 🙂
Oops, I meant Molly– sorry, Jill is my daughter’s name 🙂
everyone has different goals and what do you consider adult education to be and have you been a victim of the same? It simply means that uneducated adults are taught how to read and write while at the same time playing their normal adult roles in life. At the same time it has everything to do with teaching them on how to handle their different professions at their places of work.
As a mom of 2 kids now 20 months and 4 years, I also don’t think that not being a fan of the newborn stage doesn’t mean you’re not a great and natural mother. My two children were very different. My first had colic and reflux. The newborn stage was a nightmare for me. She never slept for more than an hour at a time and I was constantly exhausted and on the verge of tears. Then my 2nd came along and she was a very easy baby from day 1. I loved her newborn stage. So really the temperament of my kids played a huge part in how I viewed the baby stage. I think I was able to give them both what they needed, but one was definitely more enjoyable than the other. That being said-both were incredibly hard work an I don’t think I would choose to go back to those days again!
I think the "fun" commenter also should know that you in general are a pretty tough cookie (although that’s not to say I haven’t seen you sulk or complain 🙂 ).. Although clearly from her comment back – she sounds like one too!!! You are so lucky – you don’t have a colicky baby, you and Josh are pretty low key and easy going (that’s not luck – in general i think a way in which you try to live your lives), and clearly hormones/PPD aren’t an issue. You do have friends who have had a hard time in the beginning (me!) and I know you have always been an amazing listener and very helpful.. So all I can just say is ENJOY and keep posting happy posts!!! I am so happy that you are having a wonderful time and I cross my fingers it will continue.. xoxo
you give me too much credit ! although i love you for it 🙂 i am not sure how tough i am re: sleep deprivation — i HATED 30 hour call shifts with a passion, much more than some of my colleagues! that’s why i realize that my pleasant experience has everything to do with the fact that right now I”m just lucky enough to have a good sleeper 🙂
I’m so happy that you are enjoying your beautiful daughter and enjoying these early days of having an infant. Like some of the other commenters, I had a very difficult time with the early days. I had children who seemed to never sleep and were fairly difficult to soothe. I also had some symptoms of PPD, though it was probably not full blown. All that said, I did love the infancy period and think back on it is a very magical time. While this may sound contradictory to the first part of my comment, I think that many parts of parenting and raising children are experiences in profound contradictions.