Friday, July 08, 2011

doing > stewing

doing things
nearly a month ago, i decided to take a week off from blogging. i was feeling sad and sorry for myself, and disconnecting from the online world seemed like the right thing to do. i also decided not to put any pressure on myself that week: no worrying about getting workouts in or organizing social plans.

i basically sat around for a week and stewed in my own juices. and in the end?

it didn't really work. i mean, i was ready to resume writing at the end of my 7-day hiatus, but on a day-to-day basis doing less did not lead to me feeling any happier. i am sure gretchen rubin probably would have known better, and so did an astute commenter:

loyal reader [not my assessment, that was her pseudonym] wrote:
I hope that you feel better and that this break is what you need. I want to offer a word of caution though. Sometimes doing less leads to more dysphoric mood, especially if the activities were ones that are central to your identity. One of the primary treatments for depression is behavioral activation. You appear to be an amazing at engaging numerous strategies for coping but sometimes its not possible to do it by oneself. You may wish to consider more professional help. I hope you take this in the way its intended as a voice of caring and concern.
now, for a number of reasons, i am feeling myself again trending towards negativity. however, this time i do not plan on a similar approach. instead, i am going to try to seek out MORE.

more projects [yes, cook-throughs count!]

more outings. more social life. more quality time with friends + family

more art, in the form of books/movies/music

more yoga + working on meditation/mindfulness

more enjoying of the free time / resources we have now. i have not scheduled vacation for this year because i was 'saving' it in case of needing it for maternity leave . . . but i think that is the wrong approach. i can always change it, after all. and i kind of want to take this trip next year:

i mean, it could even be considered a babymoon if that's how the timing works out!

and yes, i am considering seeing a therapist at the fertility clinic [the fact that they have one in-house should reassure me i am far from alone in needing some help dealing with this issue].

so: my progesterone may be zero, but my mojo is still there. um, happy friday?

link luv
how keeping a log kept me sane, from the lovely angeliki

16 ways to find personal rest by tsh oxenreider, the author of organized simplicity

one of my favorite bloggers headed out yesterday to begin a 10 day Vipassana retreat! check out her post for details as well as a recap of the retreat from her mother's perspective

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7.7.11

workout: nada. guess what? no workouts = horrible mood. time to fix that.

and also

lazy leftovers for dinner may taste good

but are bad for my soul when eaten too many nights in a row. seriously.