yeah, i kind of knew it was coming. undergoing this big of a transition is a pretty big deal, and it's just a LOT to learn/know/figure out/do at once.
yesterday i got home at 6:45 pm, pretty much exhausted from the day (things take more energy when you're new at them!) and sat down. the following thoughts were swirling around in my head:
✘ how am i going to have time to study for the boards?
✘ how am i going to have time to do the reading i need to do?
✘ or the things i need to do for a research proposal
✘ not to mention presentations and prep for teaching sessions?
✘ how am i going to have time to do the above things AND make dinner?
✘ oh, AND actually get a reasonable amount of sleep?
✘ how am i going to deal with all-of-the-above and being on 24/7 pager call (which starts today for the next week, incidentally).
clearly, there's a theme here.
and then i checked my phone messages and found out that a) we're dog-sitting for the weekend (i had forgotten) and b) josh was staying late for an appendectomy.
let's just say it wasn't a great night after that. and i get the world's biggest FAIL on my week 2 goal. in fact, i think that may have been what set off the panic spiral in the first place!
i'm off on a longer contemplative run to think about all of this. probably a better strategy than drowning my sorrows in these: