but if you're not, that's okay too
i'm usually trying to do . . . a lot. i'm training for a marathon. i'm cooking through a cookbook (almost finished!!). i'm trying to be a good resident and read articles and things on the side. i'm attempting to keep our apartment in some semblance of order. plus, writing these posts (and drooling over the anthro offerings) takes a considerable chunk of time, too.
i guess that's mostly it, but when combined with work, it's enough. most of the time, i find a nice groove and end up meeting my goals for the day. i consider myself overall to a pretty productive and efficient person, sometimes bordering on a little . . . hypomanic (but only a little).
once in a while, though, the wheels fall off. in my typical all-or-nothing fashion, i don't just run a mile less or cook a slightly simpler meal. i just bag ALL OF IT.
that pretty much sums up the week thus far.
after my hitting-the-wall-at-5-miles run on monday (which did NOT reward me with the usual endorphin high -- i think i was too exhausted), i haven't had the energy or motivation to run. this is, to put it mildly, unlike me. especially the me with a marathon coming up in 4.5 weeks.
i also really haven't felt like cooking. or reading. or doing much of anything at all other than crashing on the couch after work and taking a nap.
i could blame it on getting over being sick (josh thinks i'm still suffering from the aftermath) or the nights-to-days switch, but i think it's just . . . me. as i mentioned, in my usual ebb and flow pattern, i spend most of my time pretty ON. but once in a while i just need a break from my checkbox-happy, goal-oriented lifestyle.
so i'm not going to feel bad about this one. marathon in 5 weeks or not, it will be okay. martha will still be there when i feel like picking up her book again. by letting myself take these few days to just do what i feel like doing, i think my world will naturally right itself sooner rather than later.
or at least expert-pop-psychology writers. in googling the title of this post (i thought it was the name of a song! apparently not . . .), i came across this article, entitled "how to pick yourself up when you are utterly demovitated." i like the addition of "utterly", because for me there's no middle ground when it comes to demotivation.
anyway, their first tip is to take a break! so apparently they agree with my strategy.
other tips they mention are:
✰ listing your achievements. think about what you have accomplished thus far with your efforts.
✰ turn your attention to the bigger picture -- recall your original reasons for your goals.
✰ work out the next step. note: not the next 30 steps, which is how i tend to think. just the first run/meal/task. much more useful and less overwhelming.
✰ take action. well, duh. thanks for that gem of a tip.
i guess they wanted to end on an empowering "DO IT!" sort of note.
for me, i think i'll just focus on finishing with my little break and planning out my next moves just one run or dinner at a time. today, i'd like to get in a run after work. hopefully i'll feel ready to make it happen.
doin' time: thankfully, when my kitchen mojo fails me, the resident omelet chef is always (well, usually) happy to step in. breakfast for dinner, anyone?
josh-made cheddar, mushroom, and yellow pepper omelet accompanied by a maple syrup-laden waffle. mmm, laziness tastes GOOD.
reading: nothing academic. but i did finish a wild sheep's chase (thank you azusa!). i loved it although i think i'd have to re-read it to fully GET it. as an aside, reading murakami always makes me want to a) eat spaghetti and b) spend a month living alone in a rustic cabin.