Sunday, July 23, 2006

toeing the line

tomorrow, i start my pediatrics sub-internship. i have been forewarned of my responsibilities [write all your own orders! know EVERYTHING about your patients! stay up all night every 4th night! and don't forget to keep smiling!] and i know where to meet my team in the morning. i suppose it's nothing i haven't done before, and i realize that i sounded all ready for it in my last entry, but . . . WHY AM I FEELING SO FREAKING ANXIOUS?

what the hell is my problem: a list

1. i hate transitions.

2. it's scary starting on an unknown team -- they could be nice, they could be grumpy, they could be stress cases who fall apart at the slightest provocation, or they could be evil. i have worked with all of these types before, and many are NO FUN.

3. i forget how to do an exam on a baby (although i will review this today)

4. i forget how to write pediatrics notes exactly (although i will look at some of these too)

5. i am terrified i am going to be unable to function sans sleep every fourth night.

6. i am worried that i will hate it and be miserable.

and so yeah. i want to do well, i want to like it, i want to be relaxed about all of this but -- this is just me. hopefully, i will feel better as soon as i have actually started. i'm on call tomorrow: let's hope that my first new admit case is something like 'small bump on the knee' and not 'neonatal meningitis.'


  1. Believe it or not, I actually enjoyed my peds sub-I, even though I had a med-peds resident :). Just remember, at least it's not surgery :)

    (I'm on call right now... sitting on the heme-onc floor... trying to keep a kid from going to the unit... whee)

  2. oh, have fun, sarah! i can't wait for my peds sub-i in a gazillion years!

  3. I hope it went well! I'm sure things will come back to you as you need them, if they haven't all come back to you already. Let us know how it is!