Sunday, October 17, 2004

to-do, or not

saturday started off with a bang: with no alarm, i was somehow up by 7:30, and managed to hit the gym AND lab (had to rescue cells from viral death) before noon. however, this productivity then came to a screeching halt.

it's ridiculous, but i'm sort of starting to miss having a busier lifestyle. yesterday (after finishing middlesex), i took a look at my to-do list and thought, "well, you know, i could do that now, or i could do it later. let's see what's on vh1." i then proceeded to waste many hours of time, and it wasn't even very enjoyable. except for making pumpkin muffins. that was kind of fun.

i think my years of hectic living have left me a bit scarred. i have trouble motivating to do things without feeling like 'if i don't do this my life is going to spin out of control!!' i've been programmed to stretch out on the couch if there's ever time, because in the past those moments were rare and fleeting. not anymore, though.

things will change quickly come november, when i start studying for the boards. i suppose i could start now, but i feel like i'll be able to retain things so much better when it's my sole focus. or perhaps i just don't feel the urgency (see above paragraph!)

well, i'm going to try to be more productive tomorrow, or at least enjoy relaxing if that's what i choose to do.

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my friend and his sister are trying to convince me to run the marathon de paris. i have to think about it. on the one hand, i really want to run a marathon, and paris sounds like a fabulous place to do it. but on the other, i am scared that i will a) fail or b) hate it or c) fail AND hate it. i honestly cannot imagine what it feels like to run 15 or 20 miles in a row, let alone 26. so we'll see . . .