Thursday, January 29, 2015

not really flowing

I am reading Flow and finding it somewhat inspiring and definitely interesting.  I am also getting frustrated.

Earlier this week, I made a conscious decision to start paying attention to when I feel like I am rushing and try to stop.  To step back, breathe, and go all in to whatever it is I am doing without any time pressure in multiple contexts:  laundry-folding, child care, patient notes.  It started out well, but halfway through a busy office day and I realized that I couldn't just opt out of the race.  Because DO THIS DO THAT GET THIS DONE NOW! started to pile up, and -- just like that, I lost my zen mojo.

I'm not ready to give up, but the failed attempt did make me sad.  I don't think I am harried because I am not managing my time well; I think I am harried because there is far too much (*@#* to do and not enough time to do it.

// end rant.  Maybe the secret is buried somewhere later in the book.  Off to bed to read more.

Tuesday, January 27, 2015

1/2 marathon report

I ran my half marathon on Sunday.  It was my third long race post-A, but my first since having C.  I ran nearly 9 minutes slower than my PR (pre-babies) but I beat my previous post-A times.  And it was great!

The race was on a beautiful and fun course through parts of Miami and Miami Beach.   We crossed two long bridges that I've only driven over, which was really fun.   And by some magic, the weather was more NC than FL.  53 degrees!  I actually wore a running jacket for the first 7 miles, although I was rather overheated by that point.  I stopped to pose for a family photo somewhere in the middle of mile 9.


By the end, I still had some gas in the tank and actually ended up running my fastest miles.  This means I probably could have been a little more aggressive, but then it might not have been so enjoyable.  And it really was.

splits on MMR
total race time = 1:55:18
(but the distance was really 13.1 mi, not 13.47 
obviously, so the splits are a bit inflated.  sadly!)

don't look so worried, mr c!

For those of you wondering how I handled race nutrition paleo-style, I didn't.  Pre-race I ate my usual pre-long run banana + sunflower seed butter, but during the race I chugged a few oz of Gatorade at miles 4, 7, 10, and 12.  I figured that for a race, it made sense.  

SOOOO, now of course I want to run more, but I am going to force myself to diversify my workouts a little and work at getting faster at shorter distances.  This probably means barre, yoga, and 5K training.  In an ideal world, I'd probably lift weights but . . . in all honesty I probably won't.

In other news, I've been doing a lot of thinking about the season of life right now.

A&C are growing up.  He'll be 1 in less than a month, and she will turn 3 in April.  C isn't walking yet, but tears around at warp speed, crawling and cruising.  He's all into whatever Annabel is doing, with an interest I didn't expect this young (i.e., he cannot help himself from demolishing any structure she's building).   A is in full-on threenager which is . . . more than slightly challenging at times.  I am working hard at being more present when I'm with them (and all the time, really) and sometime I think I'm making progress.

I have more to say on the latter topics, but A's Clubhouse time is coming to a close.

Friday, January 23, 2015

January, reading, and other goings-on

I'm about to head out on my last run before the half marathon on Sunday.

The radio silence around here is due to:

a) call
b) writer's block, I guess
c) paucity of excess time
d) generalized moodiness

I think I'm burnt out from reading so many "IT'S JANUARY CHANGE YOUR LIFE!!1!!" posts that I feel like I don't have much to add to the conversation.  It's been a bit of a rough week, for reasons that even I do not completely understand.  It's partly just fatigue -- when you are on call, you get called and interrupted all day with people asking you for various things, and then (if you're me) you come home and the little ones ask you for other things.  And then sometimes there are work calls (more asking) once I'm really past any point of usefulness and just want to be in bed.

It could be so much harder - I realize.  My life from an objective standpoint is as much as anyone could ask for.  But it doesn't always feel easy.

On the up-side:
✔ So far, I've been sticking to my one resolution and reading every night -- even if it's only for 5 minutes, as it has been for the last 2.  I finished Wild a couple of weeks ago and then The Rosie Project last week.  For me, that's some prolific reading!  I'm currently reading Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience, which has been on my list (and downloaded on my iPad) for ages.  I keep falling asleep, but I think it's my fault, not the book.

✔ A is signed up for camp this summer and school next year.  And I'm already thinking about what to do with C.  He'll be 18 months in August, but the preschool where Annabel goes starts at 20 months.  I agree that 18 months is too young to worry about that sort of thing, but waiting until the year after when he's 2 1/2 seems like a long time.  But maybe that's crazy.  (It's not a child care issue because we will be keeping our nanny until the kids graduate from college . . . but a question of the stimulation/social exposure for him.  Perhaps less of an issue for a second child?).

✔ My race is this weekend!!  Back in the day, I would be all hyped up about race strategy and nervous about meeting goals.  This time, I am mostly just looking forward to the race experience itself.  The weather calls for a beautifully-timed "cold" snap - a low of 54 degrees the night before the race, and a sunny clear day.  The forecasted high is 71, but since the race starts at 6am it's likely to be quite cool for the whole thing.  Yay!

✔ I think I'm finally going to take the plunge and try to arrange one 'night off' per week to go to yoga/barre/?? and just have that be a break in the weekly rhythm.

Recent link love:
Penelope Loves Lists is back!  Great post on her 7 minute strategy on getting things done a little bit at a time.

Laura Vanderkam's strategies for creating me-time.

13 things to do with blank notebooks from The Well-Appointed Desk

Some recent(ish) pix:

In her picture-day attire.  I just love this shot for some reason.

@ the playground.  (AKA their second home.)

2 3/4 is old enough to babysit, right?

last Sunday: C's first swim class.  He did very well!